New year, new me. That’s what everyone tells themselves as the fresh, glowing school year commences. But, to most, this is just a saying. They don’t have the determination and motivation to overcome their external and internal challenges. That was, for me, a sophomore in high school, a confusing and anxious time. I told myself I would do better than last year, and I convinced myself that. But as I trembled through the tall, twisted hallways that made up the school…

I crumbled.

Fell into a period of overwhelming chaos. I felt like I was dangling over a cliff, not having the grip to hold on. I gave up. The one thing every adult has told our younger selves is “Never give up on your dreams” yet, I did. I was coasting through half the year, not learning, not paying attention, not remembering anything.

Watching all the other students get praised.

But not me.

Why? Why not me? I flourished in sports, but why not in school?

My father has always told me “School is like a game; you just need to find a way to beat it.” I never paid attention to it, until now. I finally understood what he meant. I took that saying to heart.

I started figuring out studying strategies and improving. My grades had gotten better, but I still wasn’t satisfied. 

The feeling of someone doing better than me bothered me. The determination I gained to outperform everyone grew. I started studying

and learning, spending countless nights staying up late and losing the amount of sleep needed. I then started to see improvements and beat others in classroom competitions. 

The sense of happiness I felt that week, even though it was challenging, was gratifying. I felt a genuine happiness rooted in absorption in something outside myself.

Children like me excel and perform at a higher level when faced with competition. This is an experience that prepares a child for different situations in their future life, whether in college or at their first job. Nathan Moore, an admin of the Recess Guardian News page, found through his thorough research that “the feeling of winning prepares kids to think more strategically. Children know they can win by being more clever than their opponents” (Text 6). When children are put against one another, it encourages them to do better wherever competition is present. 

Is he right? Is it better to hand your children everything, or teach children to excel through tough life lessons on their own? Although some parents think steering children away from competition can seem beneficial, the overwhelming evidence suggests that parents should encourage and push their children into competitive environments. The research suggests that competition helps children better themselves in society; competition can also encourage kids to do better in the classroom. Through school, I can confidently say that competitive tasks have had a positive influence on me, especially in english.

In an educational setting, the balance between competition and cooperation

significantly influences student outcomes. In the classroom, where children learn and study to be intelligent and better humans, they are often faced with difficulty. While competition can be motivating, research shows that cooperative learning often yields better results. David Johnson, a professor of social psychology at the University of Minnesota, collaborated in reviewing over 109 studies from 1924 to 1980. In these comprehensive investigations, they found that in 65 of the 109 cases, “children learn better when they work cooperatively as opposed to competitively,” and eight found the opposite. And in 36 other cases, “no significant difference” was found (Text,5). That’s more than 50% of the studies. While competition has its benefits, working with others can often be proven better. In some cases, when students work cooperatively they can contribute their own unique ideas with each other, combining them as one.As a result, boosting the overall outcome of the task at hand. 

While the research may be considered right in the 20th century. It is now the 21st century. Times have changed. Kids are more focused on video games, and not their academics. Today when children work together, instead of doing the work, they mess around, postponing their work. And trust me, that was me. I would’ve rather fooled around with my friends for a few minutes than do the work that can determine the rest of my future. Children must go against each other to give them motivation to outperform others and actually do their work.

 Some may ask, “What if they lose?” Well, “Children need to practice losing in order to handle failure against their peers,” believes

Christine Carter, the author of several books on parenting. While this might seem too harsh, “Children who do not experience loss during their early years find it difficult to deal with situations that do not go their way in their lives later.” (Text,6) Losing a game is the only way for kids to learn from their mistakes and think about strategies to improve.  

This early exposure to competition can help children develop resilience and adaptability, skills that are crucial in navigating the challenges of adulthood. It also fosters a sense of responsibility and accountability, as they learn that their actions can impact the team’s overall performance.

Moreover, these experiences can cultivate a healthy competitive spirit. Children learn that while winning is rewarding, the process of striving and coming back from failure holds equal, if not more, value. They learn how to handle both success and failure with grace, understanding that both are part of life. 

In essence, the competitive experiences that children gain from sports and other activities can serve as a cross-section for a larger society. They provide a safe and controlled environment where children can learn, grow, and prepare for the complexities of the adult world. 

Deep down, when it comes to raising children, parents often seek guidance from various sources. In the past, watching educational videos or conducting research was a common approach. However, times have changed, and today’s parents have access to a wealth of information at their fingertips. 

One influential voice in this field is Alife Kohn, the author of “The Case Against Competition.” Kohn has dedicated his life to researching child development and education. Kohn believes the role of competition is an important factor in shaping our future generation. He maintains the idea that fostering healthy, happy, and productive individuals is linked to creating a better society.

Writing in his book “The Case Against Competition” Kohn puts that “Raising healthy, happy, productive children goes hand in hand with creating a better society. The first step to achieving both is to recognize our belief in the value of competition.” (Text,5) Considering the well-documented benefits of healthy competition, it becomes evident that parents should actively encourage their children to participate in competitive environments. Whether it is sports, academics, or other pursuits, exposure to competition fosters essential life skills such as resilience,determination, and adaptability. By navigating challenges, setbacks, and victories, young individuals develop a robust sense of self and learn to thrive under pressure. Moreover, competition encourages improvement, pushing children to reach their full potential. Therefore, enrolling children in competitive settings not only prepares them for the real world but also

equips them with valuable tools for personal growth and success. 

But on the other hand, the negative impact on children should also be accounted for. It’s not always talked about or acknowledged, but every future parent should hear it. 

In a world where achievement is celebrated and success is measured by trophies and medals, children face immense stress in competitive environments. The weight of expectations impacts not only their physical performance but also their mental health, friendships, and overall well-being. 

Athletes, in particular, face the relentless pressure of repetitive competition. “Athletes who don’t learn to manage the stress of repetitive competition can experience anxiety and diminished performance.” (Text 6) The very pursuit of excellence can become a double-edged sword, cutting into their joy and resilience. 

As we navigate the high-stakes world, let us remember that behind every medal and trophy lies a young heart striving for validation. 

As harsh as this sounds, this is the reality of life. No one is going to hold your hand throughout life; you need to learn on your own. But as parents, instead of throwing children into uncomfortable positions, you should help and motivate your children to become more comfortable and more capable of being on their own. And when children make a mistake, parents shouldn’t get angry and upset with them. “Instead, our job is to help kids overcome setbacks, help them see the progress […] and then graciously congratulate the child who succeeded when failed” (Text,1), said Ashley Merryman, a mother and researcher on child development.  

The crucial role of a parent is to set their child up for success and foster their self-sufficiency. Encourage independence, teach life skills, promote a growth mindset, and model responsibility. Before it’s too late, all you can do is blame yourself.